13th of July to the 23rd of July

Now there is some more room to breathe. July has been great and slowly with fewer comedy shows and the heat outside and some fewer happenings the summer is excellent. I sometimes write about my hood on a German blog and recently there have been some discussions about the content there. I write how I had to leave for a bigger city and still love the area and some of the people but politically it seems a bit like a lost cause with the right-winged rat catchers on the rise. That being said, I did play a couple of great video games and did read some fantastic books. “Tender is the flesh” is probably one of the best and darkest books that I have had the “pleasure” to read. Let’s read and write more and be creative. So here we go!

13th of July: “Victory arms in your story”

There are so many things that are innate to us humans. Even people that have been blind since birth will celebrate something by raising their arms and forming a V-shape. There is a picture of me doing that pose at the site in 2010 with my arms raised, looking to the side and countless national flags waving in the back. There is another one where I am on a dam somewhere in rural China a couple of years later. It’s fun. Why is that not a power pose? Or is it? You know the Superman hand at the hips and legs a bit wider than your shoulders? That is a power pose. It’s supposed to give you energy. When we achieve something we should just use the victory arms more often. When I am done writing I will stand up from my wooden chair and raise my arms to feel the power that this pose alone will lend me.

14th of July: “Bastille Day and other sacrifices”

I mean we just now have a war raging in Europe. It’s crazy. The bloodshed. The damages to culture, achievements, culture and human lives. That being said we should fight for something or live for nothing. While writing this, I am listening to a podcast with a German Youtuber and a member of Heaven Shall Burn - possibly the best German Metalcore band. They have lyrics that are deep and often rooted in history. “Deaf to our prayers” comes to my mind. A song about the uprising of the weavers who protested and had their machinery stand still in defiance: I love that. The power we humans can wield and without throwing a punch or firing a bullet can stand against whatever or whoever wronged us.

15th of July: “Two nouns, two adjectives, two verbs and the story they make”

With a glowing heart and a beautiful book in your hand, you can fight the most horrible demons.

16th of July: “Clear your mind and write a sentence without thinking much”

There are times when everything moves in slow motion they are triggered by the darkest of scenes and happiest of scenes.

17th of July: “Cliches in a dialogue”

“Can you describe the person that robbed this store?”

“Come on! You have seen him too. Why do I have to tell you that? Ugh! Tall, ugly, dark complexion and he was crosseyed.”

Crosseyed the policeman wrote down. “What was he wearing?”

“God! You have seen it. Grey sweatpants and a black hoody.”

“Anything missing from your shop?”

“10 Apple gift cards with different values. But they are not activated.”

10 Apple gift cards the policeman writes. “What are they for?”

“Fuck if I know. They are worthless if not activated at our cash register. The dude was mumbling something about a Microsoft Service he has to pay with these.”

“I think we are done and I will have a doughnut.” - The officer replied.

18th of July: “A character different from you is thinking”

I am still angry that our club has lost today. 3:Nil the second time this month. I hate it. At least we have a couple of pints at the bar next to the field after each game. Last game Michael had a friend coming to watch him. They hugged for a bit too long. I believe Michael is gay. Whatever! At least he is not running around in rainbow colours. I only wear black and red which are also the colours of our jerseys. I hate Sundays because tomorrow I will have to work the construction line again. It feels like I am the only real Brit working there. Mohammed, Rajhed and all the others probably also earn more than me. They have families. I don't t even have a girlfriend. They just don’t see my value. Neither the girls nor the company. At least there is always another game.

19th of July: “10 things you need to be creative”

1. I have to have something to tell. If I don't know what moves me I can't be creative.
2. I need to be alone. I find it hard to be creative when people try to talk to me.
3. Something to drink on the table.
4. A reasonable order as opposed to chaos at the place I am working at.
5. A mood. If I am too neutral or sleepy creativity does not work.
6. Inspiration.
7. No existential money problems.
8. Good tools: mechanical keyboard or a pleasant pen…
9. A place to sit comfortably.
10. I need time. Time to slack off and think. Creativity can be rushed.

20th of July: “What makes a good friend?”

A good friend is open to your ideas. A good friend is not afraid to tell you when you are wrong. I find a good friend listens thoroughly to what you have to say and doesn't just wait for his turn to say whatever they want to say. I find it really important that a good friend doesn't make you a hostage to their emotional situation. I also believe a good friend celebrates change. Change in them and in you. In Germany, there is this horrible sentence “Bleib so wie du bist.” (keep being you) and I always read that as “don't change”. People change and grow and that is a good thing. Good friends celebrate growth together.

21st of July: “Come up with your own combined animal”

I would call it Winged Devil. It is a Honey Badger with Bat wings. The most badass animal that ever roamed the earth. It picks fights with every predator around. No fear. Just badass. Thick skin, immune to every venom in the animal kingdom. The winged devil could just live off of berries and insects but it chooses to pick fights with massive hornets and wasps. Sometimes the Winged Devil swoops in over a body of water and grabs whatever would sting or bite or poison you. He doesn't give a shit. No snake or their eggs are safe. Scorpions he takes for parabellum flights through the sky before the devours them. When he is happy he spins around with his wings like a tiny tornado of badass.

22nd of July: “Exquisite Corpse Number 3”

I still do not have someone to finish these exercises with…

23rd of July: “Do you seek conflict or avoid it and what is an exception?”

I believe I try to avoid conflicts unless they are inevitable. That is also the exception. Let us say I sit with my family and suddenly the topic of discussion is conspiracy theories. I can only listen to that bullshit for so long. I will stand up and say what I think about that sort of bullshit. If something is harmless I can avoid that conflict really well and laugh it off, but there is a point where I have to throw something back in their faces. I definitely do not seek out conflict. What is the point? Discussions are an absolute necessity but it doesn't have to escalate to a conflict. Brazilian Jiu-Jitsu teaches us to become comfortable in uncomfortable positions. I find that sometimes we just have to endure. If however our threshold is reached or someone might get hurt physically or emotionally we have to fight and stand up in a conflict. We have to be the voice of the voiceless or just shut our faces if we don't have something productive to say.